And the winning answer is...
Nothing. Nothing at all. Nothing can go wrong. Nothing has ever gone wrong.
Everything that happens is the perfect and correct thing to support our healing and growth in that moment. Ah, but how easy it is to forget this amidst a flood of emotion. The only thing we have to fear is unconsciousness. And I found myself lost in the illusion for a little while there, remembering and clearing past pain.
My ex was a perfect reflection to me. He fulfilled his purpose in my life completely. In his inability to receive my love, he reflected my inability to receive love. When he was unable to give love to me, he reflected my inability to love myself.
When I am aware of this, my anger and pain turns to gratefulness to him for performing so well at what must have been a very unpleasant role to play in my life.
And while I'm on the subject of love, there's a little poem that reads, "Love wasn't put in your heart to stay, because love isn't love until you give it away." It doesn't matter how much love you feel in your heart for someone, if you don't share it, it is of no benefit to them.
And another thing or two or three, "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." - Plato. "Believe nothing you hear and only half of what you see." - Mark Twain. The point is that just because someone seems to have it together doesn't mean they aren't facing any difficulties, or growth opportunities as you might call them. Things are not always as they appear. In fact, I suspect they frequently aren't. We learn to hide much of what we are experiencing for various reasons. The point is, let us all remember to be kind to one another. You never know when your kindness might be just the impetus someone needs to keep holding on.
"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around." - Leo Buscaglia.
Don't be afraid to touch.
More great stuff! I've recently come into this realization about relationships (and especially those that seem difficult) and it has helped me so much to shift to looking for messages ("in the mirror") and feeling gratitude for that person in the face of what feels like adversity or conflict.
ReplyDeleteAnd I have also been discovering that on some level I haven't been ready to receive love, though happy to give it unconditionally. Huge shifts once that settled in...am still chewing on that of course ;)
Thank you for writing about this!