Love is always within us and all around us, but there is a science to relationship. I'm not just talking about the chemicals of attraction. I'm talking cause and effect.
Typically, we meet someone. We put on a show for one another. If we like what we see, we become aware of feeling love. But where does that love come from? It's already there, within us.
Then, we start seeing things in the other that we judge undesirable. Our awareness of love starts to be covered over by those judgments. If we don't observe this and drop our judgments, soon we will feel we have fallen out of love. We didn't fall out of love, because we didn't fall into love in the first place. We awakened to awareness of the love that is within us.
Now, some will read this and think that I mean that all relationships can and should be saved. No, I don't mean that at all. Some relationships are toxic to your soul, and should be grieved and buried, so that we can open to something that supports our growth, expansion and healing.
Nevertheless, we can end a relationship without anger, without bitterness, without any of the other forms of anger we usually think must be present to conclude a relationship. You can even end a relationship with love. Just because being in a relationship with someone is not for your highest good doesn't mean you can't wish them well and mean it.
Think about this, if a relationship is not really good for you, it's not really good for anyone. Would you want someone to stay with you for any reason other than it's exactly where they want to be? Really? I know I wouldn't.
Let's grow up and let the way we conduct our relationships reflect our growth.
Thursday, July 08, 2010
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