Loving It All

I felt the Beloved in my heart space today, and I experienced a most delicious sense of expansion there.

I've been feeling life force energy stirring in my second chakra quite often for quite some time, it still being an area that is in process of clearing and healing.

But today, the energy moved around quite a bit, also stirring in my solar plexus and creating a wonderful melting and expansive feeling in my prefontal cortex.

Love keeps doing its perfect work and reminding me of my wholeness. I am loving it!

And I realized tonight that being in love does not require a love object. The most expansive and liberating way to be in love is to be in love with life, loving all of life. It is all love. Love is all there is.

Get Your OWN Path

There have been times when I have read other people's testimonials about how this course or that book completely changed their lives. All of a sudden, everything clicked and their whole lives fell into place. And I have wondered why I haven't come across any teaching that has just pulled it all together for me.

Tonight, it dawned on me that the reason no one path has been "the answer" for me is that I don't belong on anyone else's path. Oh, there have been plenty of people who have helped me along my path - people who asked just the right questions or spoke just the right words or took just the right actions to awaken the exact knowledge I needed to move forward. However, the knowledge was not an addition from outside me. It was already within and only needed to be discovered.

My path is undefinable, and therefore unfollowable, and unduplicatable. And I am glad. Defining a path tends toward dogma and I am much happier without dogma in my life.

Something Better than Polyamory

One of the things I keep coming across as I research sacred sexuality on the web is the concept and practice of polyamory.

Call me wild, but I suggest we skip polyamory and go straight to omniamory. Okay, technically, it's not a word, but I think it should be.

Obviously, I'm not suggesting we enter into sexual relationships with everyone on the planet. Not only would that be unhealthy (and impossible considering the number of humans populating the planet at the moment), it would be downright illegal and harmful in some cases.

I'm talking pure, unadulterated love for all. Come on, you say, we can't really love everybody. To which I reply, why not?

Of course we can't be BFF with everybody in the world, and our agreement to the illusion of time and space prevents us from getting to know everyone; nevertheless, we absolutely can come from a place of love in our hearts that causes us to contribute to our world and those we interact with in a loving and beneficial way. We can open our hearts to others, and in the process, empower them to open as well.

What causes us to believe we must place a limit on how many people we love is that we confuse love with attachment. We form certain attachments in order to interact with others in the various roles we decide to play, as parents, spouses, lovers, friends, etc. But those attachments don't necessarily come from love, and love doesn't necessarily lead to attachment.

Love is more than a warm feeling, it is acting in the best interests of all. We may not feel warm and fuzzy toward everyone we pass on the street, but we can absolutely act lovingly toward all.

Is it not love that performs a random act of kindness, or gives a meal or a blanket to someone in need, or offers to help someone with a difficult task? Is it not love that listens to someone who is hurting and offers words of comfort? Is it not love that helps someone who is carrying a heavy burden? Is it not love that reaches out to touch someone when they are down, that offers words of encouragement to those who feel they can't go on? It is love, and when we reach out in love, we are being the instrument through which love pours its beautiful music into the world, uniting the hearts of all who hear.

Leo Buscaglia said it well, "Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around."

Let's do it! Let's love 'em all.

Just When You Thought It Was Safe...

That safety thing again.

I thought I was done playing it safe. And then I noticed a pattern that I have seen repeated relatively often in my life recently. A gentleman had showed some interest in me, and I found myself backing away after feeling that he was backing away.

So, I asked myself, "Why does this keep recurring?"

And myself answered, "You push people away and then blame their lack of interest for the lack of progression in the relationship."

Ouch! Busted! And by my own self, too. You'd think my self would go a little easy on me. After all, no one knows better than my self what I have been through and the reasons I do the things I do.

Speaking of reasons, I found myself asking myself, "What are the reasons I behave in this way?"

And damn if myself didn't reply that looking for reasons is just another way I keep myself from moving forward.

Good grief! Give me a break already! But nooooo, my self has to be all about the highest good and shit.

Alright. Fine, then! It's all me. There, I admitted it. Are you happy now?!?!

Okay, I'll admit it does feel good to step out of the darkness and into the light. At least, when you know it's all coming from inside, you know that in addition to owning responsibility for your own creation, you also own the power to create whatever you decide to create.

Yeah, baby! That's what I'M talking about.

Love Your Shadows

This was posted on the Heal Thyself tribe message board at tribe.net. I love it!

There are some wonderful people posting on Tribe.net. I find it very uplifting to read the posts (most of them).

Love your shadows

"There is that part of ourselves that feels ugly, deformed, unacceptable. That part, above all, we must learn to cherish, embrace, and call by name."
-- Macrina Wiederkehr

Each of us has characteristics we define as ‘good’ and those we define as ‘bad.’ The parts of ourselves that we continually reject want to be acknowledged and loved. Until we honour these aspects, they will continue to assert themselves. They will do whatever they can to get our attention.
What aspects of yourself do you reject?
Take a few moments to open to the parts of yourself that you do not love. See each one honestly for what it is. Explore the wounds and the motives that gave rise to its condition. Love a wounded part of yourself and it will heal.

"...self-contempt never inspires lasting change."
-- Jane R. Hirschmann and Carol H. Munter

"The first step toward change is acceptance. Once you accept yourself, you open the door to change. That's all you have to do. Change is not something you do, it's something you allow."
-- Will Garcia

posted by:
Jeff
SF Bay Area
53 friends

My Teacher, Master Smoky, the Cat

I received an interesting lesson today in the Law of Attraction from Smoky, the Cat. Smoky demonstrated beautifully the simplicity of the principle, Thoughts Become Things.

He has demonstrated this lesson many times for me, but today I finally got it.

His manifestation unfolded in this manner: he went to the door and stood there patiently gazing at the door until I went to the door and opened it to let him out.

How simple! How profound! He didn't scratch or claw or meow or hiss. He simply focused on what he wanted until it came into being.

Wow! If only we had the wisdom of a cat!

Keep Doing It

I was just reminded that in the original language of the Bible, verbs have a continuous tense...at least, I have been told that is the case.

...which means that "ask, and it shall be given" signifies asking continuously;

..."seek and you shall find" indicates a continuous seeking until the discovery occurs;

..."knock and it shall be opened to you" connotes continuous knocking until the door opens.

Need I say more?

It's All You

We teach people how to treat us. We communicate what we're willing to tolerate by what we do tolerate.

So, if you don't like the way a relationship is going, change your direction. Stand up for your life and your self. You can't change the direction for someone else. What you can do is change your own direction and then it's possible that others around you will respond and change. But there are no guarantees along those lines. If we are not prepared to accept another's behavior just as it is, we may choose to communicate our preferences. It is then up to the other to decide whether they want to continue as they are or make adjustments for our comfort. This may depend on whether they consider the trait or behavior in question to be a preference or to representative of who they really are. It is never reasonable to ask or expect someone to change their essential self to satisfy us.

If the other decides to continue doing as they are doing, and being as they are being, it is then up to us to decide whether the relationship serves us as it is. If not, the most loving thing we can do is to let go. Let go and let them be as they choose to be. Let go and let us be as we choose to be.

Another thing you may want to consider when you don't like the way a relationship or interaction is occurring is to ask yourself what is being reflected back to you. Others are mirrors of what is inside us.

If we repeatedly find ourselves feeling abandoned or ignored, we may ask how we are abandoning or ignoring ourselves and our own needs. If we feel devalued or disrespected, we may need to look at how we are devaluing or disrespecting ourselves. Once we are aware of how we are mistreating ourselves, and we make the shift necessary to honor and cherish ourselves, that is what we will see reflected in our relationships with others.

When good things don't seem to be coming our way, when our dreams and desires are not manifesting, we need to become aware that no one is blocking our good except we ourselves. And when we are ready to receive our highest good, we will find it was there all the time, just waiting for us to open our arms and welcome and embrace it.

When we are ready, we will receive. Until we are ready, we cannot receive. Everything is unfolding in perfect time and in perfect order.

How fascinating!

Saying "Yes"

"UNFOLDING AND ALLOWING

The definition of a master is not one whose life is perfect. A master is one who says, “Yes!” to whatever shows up on one’s plate. By saying “Yes” we unlock the raw energy of a situation. It becomes accessible to us to use in whatever way we choose.
Synchronicity occurs. It is just raw energy flowing.

JUDGMENT STOPS THE FLOW

By choosing judgment, anger, guilt, blame, or other aspects of fear, we say “No” to the experience and immediately encounter resistance, a block to energy. We fall out of harmony with the flow. Answers, that would have streamed forth, remain hidden, unrevealed, locked within the blocked energy."

This is an excerpt from an article entitled Miracle Journey written by Dolly Mae and published in The Psychic Observer.

Good stuff. Very good stuff.

Activate Your Passion

The Blessing of the To-Do(or was that To-Be?) List© 2008
Julie Jordan Scott

My eyes scanned the day's speedily written to-do list, outlined
fetchingly in black crayon.

I looked at my mood indicator on myspace, where I had for unknown
reasons declared I wanted to explore the river, but I wasn't exactly
sure what that meant. On my list of "to-do's" I had written
"collect wood" so I figured that would combine with river exploration.

I read a quote from Maya Angelou and again, wondered what
syncronicity was doing tap-tap-tapping on my heart.

"A woman in harmony with her spirit is like a river flowing.
She goes where she will without pretence and arrives at her
destination prepared to be herself and only herself."

The only two things on my daytime carved in time-allotted stone
schedule were a phone call and to be home when Sam was due
back from school at 2:45. The phone call was to be at 9:00 o'clock,
nice and early, with my friend, Stephanie, who agreed to talk to me,
deeply and soulfully once a week while I dealt with some of this
"stuff" of life that came as a part of my reawakening. I felt like I hadn't
"done" enough to merit a conversation of substance.

I stood back for a bit, though, prior to the prearranged time for our
phone call and I discovered that lo-and-behold there had been a lot
of growth this week, that I had taken what we had talked about
before and integrated much of what we spoke of and
amplified it… many fold.

I had gotten stuck in my self-critical inner dialogue of the day before and lost
sight of the beauty and wonder of the preceding six days.

"I just don't feel like I have big enough swaths of time and yet
I know that isn't so, I mean, I am aware that I make that up, that the
swaths aren't wide enough… I know this lack based thinking is just
creating more lack rather than abundance… and… I mean…" and I tap
danced in circles of belief and misbelief during our conversation.

I continued speaking: "I just need more time in silence, and study,
and contemplation." I told her. "I have felt such grace, such
abundance since we last spoke," I said as I told several stories of
receiving, abundantly, simply as a result of me being 100% myself – not trying
to get anything accomplished in particular or aiming at a particular intention
beyond simply being me and doing exactly what
my heart called me to do.

Maya Angelou floated back into my mind.

"A woman in harmony with her spirit is like a river flowing. She
goes where she will without pretence and arrives at her destination prepared to
be herself and only herself."

The river was calling.

I climbed into my beloved Ford Explorer, Jane, and started to
drive east. Live Oak, Live Oak, Live Oak was a chant running through
my veins – the echo of my heartbeat itself.

Live Oak is a daytime use section of the Sequoia National Forest, five
miles into the Kern River Canyon. I hadn't been there since July and
I was curious how it was during the winter as compared to the Summer.
I figured the flow of the river would be satisfying given all the rain
and snow we were having.

I was excited.

Jane started making a sound I thought was weird and I felt fear grip me. "Maybe
I shouldn't go to the river. Maybe it isn't God
calling, maybe I should get an oil change first, maybe I should turn around, oh
it looks dark in the canyon, maybe I am going to get into an accident if I drive
in, maybe....maybe.....maybe....."

The circle dance of belief and misbelief was taking up residence
in my belly.

"Maybe you should tune into that silence you said you wanted," a
whisper-thought came into my heart.

I heard the Live Oak chant again as my car entered the canyon.

I drove into the call of the Canyon, into the call of the river. I drove into
the darkness of my fear. My heart was pounding rather loudly in the fear places
and I wasn't comfortable at all as I drove into the mouth of the Canyon. It was
dark, the fog closed behind me – a door shutting my escape, and I surrendered to
the call.

I uncomfortably surrended, as Teresa of Avila reminded me,
"Surrender requires courage."

The road was beautifully empty so I felt no pressure to go fast
along the curves. I could take my time and really see what I was
passing in each moment. I started to relax into my heartbeat
and to the rhythm of the call itself.

A red car came up behind me and the "Live Oak" chant became
"take a turn out" so I did and the red car behind me happily
tooted a "thank you" horn as it moved past me towards its destination.

I was almost sad when Live Oak arrived so quickly.

I took the "Road Closed" into the parking lot as a set back
until I realized there was a ready-made turn out parking spot to use so I parked
Jane and climbed out and just stood, stood, stood for a
moment breathing the chilled, crisp air.

I spent, in "human time" about 45 minutes by the River. I
didn't need an enormous "swath of time" in which to experience soul
fulfillment. I could have stayed there for a lot longer, but there
wasn't a need. I was able to celebrate the sounds of squirrels,
the sight of a tiny bird with yellow and green in its very small
flight across the sky. I was able to celebrate the sensual aroma
from an enormous pinecone, the sweet kisses of the wind on
my face and the divine direction telling me which path to take,
which tree to honor with my touch, my prayers, my tears.

In following the call into the canyon, I slashed out sections
of misbelief that were whining or complaining or coming
remotely close to anything labeled "less than" or "not
enough" or "I don't have" or "I can't."

This very short "field trip" away from my cocoon like home
brought me to astounding levels of awareness and presented
me with a gift that I can continue to pass around to my friends,
my beloved readers, to complete strangers who happen upon
these words and say, "Yes, this is good."

It took letters hastily scrawled on a black crayon written to-do
list and leveraged what was there and followed it to slicing through
fear and into the expansive soulfulness of simply being in the moment.

Passion rang out from the crayon, it was in the machete-like movement
of my car into the canyon, it is in being bold and courageous when I
didn't
particularly feel like being bold and courageous when I trusted
in the rhythmic call and kept moving forward anyway.

And I am so grateful I did.

This story repeats itself countless times in my life.

And each time it is richer and deeper and sweeter. I never fail to be
amazed, awestruck, grateful and so glad I am exactly who I am with exactly this
perspective in exactly this moment.

I hear Maya speaking again.

"A woman in harmony with her spirit is like a river flowing. She
goes where she will without pretence and arrives at her destination prepared to
be herself and only herself."

Yes, Yes, Yes – so be it.

+ = + =
Julie Jordan Scott is a Writer, Life Coach, Poet, Speaker,
Actor, Director and Mom Extraordinaire whose deepest passion
is helping people - like you - discover and live with
passion. Call 661.444.2735 to book your complimentary
coaching session or visit http://www.passionactivator.com

for plentiful resources to live a passion-rich life.

Do One Thing DIfferent

There's a simple way to improve your life that is so simple, it is often overlooked. But if we would practice it, we would begin to feel better immediately.

It's simply this: if you don't like the results you're getting from some pattern of behavior or interaction, change it. I have heard insanity defined as doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

If you keep doing the same thing, you can expect to keep seeing the same results. Hello! It sounds ridiculously simple. And yet, it seems to be the last thing we think of so much of the time, if we ever think of it at all.

And yet, even changing one small thing in a pattern can produce profoundly different results.

There's actually a book on the subject, Do One Thing Different: Ten Simple Ways to Change Your Life by Bill O'Hanlon.

It's amazing to me that often the most profound changes in our lives occur as the result of doing very simple things. In fact, often when the light comes on and we become aware of how simple it is to live a life of joy and richness, we ask ourselves why we didn't see it before.

The answer, once again, is simple. It doesn't matter how simple a concept it, if you are not ready for it, you won't get it. Others may tell you over and over how simple it is, and explain it in the easiest-to-understand terms, and yet you will resist it or complicate it, until you are ready and open to receive it.

So, the first step is to open up. Be willing to accept that things could be different. And that you have the power to make it so.

Have a blissful day!

And change something, if you want to.

Little Lessons (With a Big Impact)

Sometimes everything that needs to be said to powerfully transform a situation or paradigm can be stated in a single word, sentence or paragraph.

Here are some small but powerful lessons that have made a difference in my life:

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the power to turn a life around." - Leo Buscaglia

"There's so much good in the worst of us
And so much bad in the best of us
That it ill behooves any of us
To find fault with the rest of us." - Unknown

"A wise old owl lived in an oak
The more he saw, the less he spoke
The less he spoke, the more he heard
Why can't we all be like that bird?"
- I want to attribute this to Ogden Nash, but I wouldn't swear to it in a court of law.

"Better resolve to win thy heart's desire
And striving bravely die in the endeavor
Than to have the embers of some smothered fire
Lie smoldering in thy saddened soul forever" - Unknown

"The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it." - W M Lewis

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?" Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us. It's in everyone. And as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." - Marianne Williamson

"No great genius has ever existed without some touch of madness." - Aristotle

"Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in ones favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe's couplets: 'Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it! Boldness has genius, magic, and power in it.'" - W H Murray

"Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.

"The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours." - Ayn Rand

"Things that matter most must never be at the mercy of things that matter least." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat." - Theodore Roosevelt


OUTWITTED

He drew a circle that shut me out -
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout.
But love and I had the wit to win:
We drew a circle that took him in!

Edwin Markham


"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." - Maya Angelou

"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow." - Mary Anne Radmacher

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." - Dr Seuss

"We don't have to wait for some grand utopian future. The future is an infinite succession of presents, and to live now as we think human beings should live, in defiance of all that is bad around us, is itself a marvelous victory." - Howard Zinn, Historian

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow." - Melody Beattie

"Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy." - Thich Nhat Hanh

"If you are going through hell...keep going." - Winston Churchill

"Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we
cannot live within." – James Baldwin

"I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him."
Booker T. Washington

"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed." - Michael Jordan

"...try picturing a lobster...snug and protected in its familiar shell. But for the lobster to grow, it must break open that rigid shell to make room for the new one growing beneath it. Once the old shell has been broken, the lobster has nothing but its newly revealed shell, thin as a membrane, to protect it. It would be right for the lobster to fear this change of shell, because at this point it is extremely vulnerable. But this vulnerable state is the prerequisite for growing into a larger creature. In time the shell will harden and mature. If the lobster refused to break open the shell it knew originally, it would only succeed in stunting its growth." - Margaret Lobenstine, "The Renaissance Soul"

Yeah, baby. That's what I'm talking about.

The Work - a Powerful Practice for Transformation

What is The Work?

The Work is a simple yet powerful process of inquiry that teaches you to identify and question the stressful thoughts that cause all the suffering in the world. It's a way to understand what's hurting you, a way to end all your stress and suffering.

People who do The Work faithfully report life-changing results.

Eliminate stress: Live without anxiety or fear

Improve relationships: Have a new sense of connection and intimacy with your husband or wife, your parents, your children, and with yourself

Reduce anger: Get angry less often and less intensely, and eventually not at all

Eliminate depression: See perfection in situations that were once debilitating

Clarity: Act more intelligently and effectively

Energy: Experience a new sense of vigor and well-being

Peace: Learn how to love what is, and find lasting inner peace


How to Do The Work

1. Judge Your Neighbor

For thousands of years we’ve been told not to judge, but we still do it all the time—how our friends should act, whom our children should care about, what our parents should feel, do, or say. In The Work, rather than suppress these judgments, we use them as starting points for self-realization. By letting the judging mind have its life on paper, we discover through the mirror of those around us what we haven't yet realized about ourselves.

Fill in a Judge-Your-Neighbor worksheet[below]:

The Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet

Fill in the blanks below, using short, simple sentences. Don’t censor yourself; don’t be wise or “spiritual.” Take this opportunity to express your negative feelings on paper.

1. Who angers, irritates, saddens, or frustrates you, and why?
I am ________________ at ________________ because ____________________________________
Example: I am angry at Paul because he doesn’t listen to me, he doesn’t appreciate me, he argues with everything I say.

2. How do you want them to change?
What do you want them to do?
I want ________________ to ____________________
_____________________________________________.
Example: I want Paul to see that he is wrong.
I want him to apologize.

3. What is it that they should or shouldn't do, be, think, or feel?
________________ should/shouldn't ____________________________________________.
Example: Paul should take better care of himself. He shouldn't argue with me.

4. What do they need to do in order for you to be happy?
I need________________ to ____________________________________________.
Example: I need Paul to hear me and respect me.

5. What do you think of them? Make a list.
________________ is ________________________
_________________________________________.
Example: Paul is unfair, arrogant, loud, dishonest, way out of line, and unconscious

6. What is it that you don't want to experience with that person again?
I don't ever want to __________________________
____________________________________________.
Example: I don’t ever want to feel unappreciated by Paul again. I don’t ever want to see him smoking and ruining his health again.


2. The Four Questions

Investigate each of your statements from the Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet using the four questions and the turnaround below. The Work is meditation. It’s about awareness, not about trying to change your thoughts. Ask the questions, then take your time, go inside, and wait for the deeper answers to surface. Download the blue sheet for use as a facilitation guide.

In its most basic form, The Work consists of four questions and a turnaround. For example, the first thought that you might question on the above Worksheet is "Paul doesn't listen to me." Find someone in your life about whom you have had that thought, and let's do The Work. "[Name] doesn't listen to me":

Is it true?

Can you absolutely know that it's true?

How do you react when you think that thought?

Who would you be without the thought?

Then turn it around (the concept you are questioning), and don't forget to find three genuine examples of each turnaround.


3. Turn it Around


After you've investigated your statement with the four questions, you're ready to turn it around (the concept you are questioning).

Each turnaround is an opportunity to experience the opposite of your original statement and see what you and the person you've judged have in common.

A statement can be turned around to the opposite, to the other, and to the self (and sometimes to "my thinking," wherever that applies). Find a minimum of three genuine examples in your life where each turnaround is true.

For example, "Paul doesn't understand me" can be turned around to "Paul does understand me." Another turnaround is "I don't understand Paul." A third is "I don't understand myself."

Be creative with the turnarounds. They are revelations, showing you previously unseen aspects of yourself reflected back through others. Once you've found a turnaround, go inside and let yourself feel it. Find a minimum of three genuine examples where the turnaround is true in your life.

As I began living my turnarounds, I noticed that I was everything I called you. You were merely my projection. Now, instead of trying to change the world around me (this didn't work, but only for 43 years), I can put the thoughts on paper, investigate them, turn them around, and find that I am the very thing I thought you were. In the moment I see you as selfish, I am selfish (deciding how you should be). In the moment I see you as unkind, I am unkind. If I believe you should stop waging war, I am waging war on you in my mind.

The turnarounds are your prescription for happiness. Live the medicine you have been prescribing for others. The world is waiting for just one person to live it. You're the one.

Examples of Turnarounds

Here are a few more examples of turnarounds:

"He should understand me" turns around to:
- He shouldn't understand me. (This is reality.)
- I should understand him.
- I should understand myself.

"I need him to be kind to me" turns around to:
- I don't need him to be kind to me.
- I need me to be kind to him. (Can I live it?)
- I need me to be kind to myself.

"He is unloving to me" turns around to:
- He is loving to me. (To the best of his ability)
- I am unloving to him. (Can I find it?)
- I am unloving to me (When I don't inquire.)

"Paul shouldn't shout at me" turns around to:
- Paul should shout at me. (Obviously: In reality, he does sometimes. Am I listening?)
- I shouldn't shout at Paul.
- I shouldn't shout at me.

(In my head, am I playing over and over again Paul's shouting? Who's more merciful, Paul who shouted once, or me who replayed it a 100 times?)

Embracing Reality

After you have turned around the judgments in your answers to numbers 1 through 5 on the Worksheet (asking if they are as true or truer), turn number 6 around using "I am willing ..." and "I look forward to ..."

For example, "I don't ever want to experience an argument with Paul" turns around to "I am willing to experience an argument with Paul" and "I look forward to experiencing an argument with Paul." Why would you look forward to it?

Number 6 is about fully embracing all of mind and life without fear, and being open to reality. If you experience an argument with Paul again, good. If it hurts, you can put your thoughts on paper and investigate them. Uncomfortable feelings are merely the reminders that we've attached to something that may not be true for us. They let us know that it's time to do The Work.

Until you can see the enemy as a friend, your Work is not done. This doesn't mean you must invite him to dinner. Friendship is an internal experience. You may never see him again, you may even divorce him, but as you think about him are you feeling stress or peace?

In my experience, it takes only one person to have a successful relationship. I like to say I have the perfect marriage, and I can't really know what kind of marriage my husband has (though he tells me he's happy too).

For an example of how to put this into practice, see the following video demonstration.

Dancing With God

Hello friends,

Thank you to Lynda Peeler and Kathy Mann for sharing this
with me so that I can share it with you. It is amazingly
profound ... Enjoy!

Dancing With God

When I meditated on the word Guidance
I kept seeing 'dance' at the end of the word.
I remember reading that doing God's will is a lot like
dancing.

When two people try to lead, nothing feels right.
The movement doesn't flow with the music,
and everything is quite uncomfortable and jerky.

When one person realizes that, and lets the other lead,
both bodies begin to flow with the music.
One gives gentle cues, perhaps with a nudge to the back
or by pressing lightly in one direction or another.
It's as if two become one body, moving beautifully.

The dance takes surrender, willingness,
and attentiveness from one person
and gentle guidance and skill from the other.

My eyes drew back to the word Guidance.
When I saw 'G: I thought of God, followed by 'u' and 'i'.
'God, 'u' and 'i' dance'
God, you, and I dance.

As I lowered my head, I became willing to trust
that I would get guidance about my life.
Once again, I became willing to let God lead.

My prayer for you today is that God's blessings
and mercies be upon you on this day and everyday.
May you abide in God as God
abides in you.

Dance together with God, trusting God to lead
and to guide you through each season of your life.
This prayer is powerful and there is nothing attached.

If God has done anything for
you in your life,
please share this message with someone else,
for prayer is one of the best gifts we can receive.
There is no cost but a lot of rewards;
so let's continue to pray for one another !

And I Hope You Dance

Wow, that is fantastic!

Many blessings.

In sincere appreciation,

Linda Miller
269-685-7024

Do You Want What You Want?

What would you want if you knew it was absolutely okay for you to want whatever you want?

Hmmm...scary question, huh? Until we free ourselves to want what we want, our wants tend to get all tangled up in other people's rules and expectations. What a wonderful way to live, right? Wrong!

Here's the thing: God didn't create you to be me, and I wasn't created to be you. We are not intended to be a replica or a duplicate or a reasonable facsimile of anyone else in the universe. We are intended to be the individual we were created to be. Our quirks and preferences and eccentricities don't break us, they make us.

So, what of this incredible urge many of us feel to conform? Okay, let's face it: a certain amount of conformity is good for us. It's scary enough, for instance, to drive in Houston, without having everyone deciding randomly whether to obey the traffic lights or not.

It's when we conform in ways that squelch our true selves, hide our light under a bushel or in any way diminish the glorious masterpiece that God created us to be that we fail ourselves deeply and profoundly. If there is any such thing as sin, that must be it.

Here we are, creatures of God, created in the image of God, and individuated for the purpose of having a unique experience of life for God, and we are desperately trying to squelch as many indications of our individuality as possible. And for what? For the pretense of acceptance, the illusion of approval, that fades away the second we fail to conform to an acceptable level.

We sell out our souls - for nothing. I say nothing because there is no substance to the approval of others, to someone else's validation. It is all smoke and mirrors and the slightest wisp of wind will reveal its fallacy.

Instead of trying desperately to secure the approval of others, why don't we begin to secure our own approval - that glorious feeling of looking into the mirror and liking, no loving, the person looking back at us; the delight of knowing that we have been true to our self and to the desires God has given us.

Our desires are an expression of God's intention to experience life in all its forms and potentialities. And yet we are free to choose. That's how much we are loved. We can absolutely go through life experiencing a tiny fraction of all that God has for us, if we so choose.

But is that what we really want? I think the problem today is consciousness. Obviously, it's not really a problem, but it does make it difficult to go on in our image-driven, other-centered, approval-seeking ways. At least it makes it difficult to do so comfortably. Enough of us are waking up that we are having difficulty ignoring the call that comes from the depths of our hearts and souls - the call to authenticity; the call to deepen and broaden and expand our experience of all that life offers; the call to make something meaningful and significant of the opportunities we are given.

The easiest thing to do may be to bury ourselves in some sort of unconscious behavior that will distract us from our longings so that we can go on with our lives. Isn't that tragic?

I could almost imagine God's disappointment. Except that there is no space for disappointment in unconditional love. God is perfectly okay with us squandering our life if that's what we choose to do. God's perfect, unconditional love accepts it all. And we can, too. But at the same time, if we can accept wasting our life on things that really mean nothing to us, why can't we imagine deciding instead to create the best life experience possible?

It truly is up to us. We get to decide. And then we get to live with the consequences of our decisions. It's something to think about.

Beloved Terrorists

I was thinking about terrorism recently and I realized that many of the people who use threats to control others do so with good intentions.

They are infected with fear themselves and they believe that by passing on their fears to others, they will save others from the fearsome consequences they dread themselves.

I am familiar with this kind of terrorism, having come from a church background where terrorism is practiced regularly. The people who preached a gospel of fear were not cruel people. They honestly believed that their teachings would benefit all who would heed them.

I have also known the kind of terrorism that communicates: "Conform or else." Parents are often guilty of this kind of terrorism. Their intentions are usually pure. They want us to become people of good character and good habits so that our quality of life will be the best it can possibly be. In my view, the only reason it becomes necessary for them to use terrorism to achieve their goals is their own lack of imagination, and possibly lack of a solid foundation. My discovery with my own children is that if you lay a foundation of open communication, which includes listening to at least 350 of the 400 question they ask every day when they are small, and answering as many of them as possible, you may find it unnecessary to instill fear in them. It is the relationship that causes them to want to develop good character. They naturally idolize their parents and want to please. If you let them know how much you appreciate their displays of love, generosity and other elements of good character, it is human nature for them to want more of that. It is called positive reinforcement. I am a firm believer in natural consequences, as well, but I believe they are not needed as often when you use plenty of positive reinforcement.

Of course, there are those terrorists who know exactly what they are doing. They want power and control, pure and simple. It seems from my observation that such people are usually brought down by their own harmful intentions. The terrorists I am talking about here may not carry machine guns or take part in suicide missions. Many of them wear nice suits and hold high positions in government or the community.

But I'm not sure they are capable of doing as much damage as the terrorists who love us, the ones who mean well, and so the fears get mixed up in the love and are much easier to believe and harder to shake.

We all have lessons to learn in this life, and one of them is to use our own gray matter to figure out for ourselves what we want our lives to be. No matter what we may have been taught, we are responsible for creating our own best lives, and if we choose not to, there is no one to blame but the person looking back at us from the mirror.

Discovering Wholeness

We call it healing, implying that there is something that is not perfect in us in the first place. Perhaps we could more appropriately call it discovering our wholeness.

It is a difficult concept for us in a world where we are constantly being bombarded with messages that something is wrong. And then we amplify the idea that something is wrong by continuously looking for problems to solve. I have noticed in myself a tendency to think something is wrong, and I recognize it as a habit of mind. If you are accustomed to spending a lot of time in your mind, you may discover this tendency in yourself, as well. And, wonder of wonders, if we are continuously looking for something wrong, guess what we are going to find? That's because we are creating what we are looking for. It is our looking for something that is not quite right that makes it so.

I recently had an experience that I find an interesting illustration of discovering wholeness. For years, I have been working through issues relating to the sexual abuse that I experienced as a child. I made some progress with psychotherapy, but I wanted more than progress. I wanted wholeness. I wanted to leave it all behind. And many times, I thought I had, only to find the issues resurfacing later.

I came to understand that I needed to forgive my abusers in order to release the pain I was still holding on to. And so, I forgave as best I knew how, going back over the memories I held of these events and forgiving each occurrence to the best of my ability.

I am always exploring and open to learning new ways of seeing things. And on several occasions, the truth was brought to my awareness that we do well to be grateful for everything because every person and event and experience holds some gift, if we are open to receiving. So, I decided to thank my abusers, going back over each memory and observing with new eyes, looking for the gift contained in these experiences.

I know. It sounds weird. And yet I am open to facilitate healing in others because of the pain I have experienced. I cherish life because I have walked through the valley of the shadow of death.

Ask and it is always given, although no one will force us to receive. And so, continuing on my journey of discovery, I became aware that the next step in letting go of the illusion of suffering would be to love my abusers. That was a hard pill to swallow. Yet the truth is that the reason we have need to forgive is that we are judging in the first place. Now, I am not saying I am prepared to tell everyone to drop their judgments, especially those who have been deeply hurt. That is a very personal decision. All I know is that I am prepared to drop mine or at least begin this practice.

And so, continuing on my journey, a good friend and mentor pointed out to me that I was afraid to own my power. I immediately recognized the truth in this statement, and I related it primarily to the physical abuse of my mother by her second husband. My higher self later revealed a connection between my abuse issues and my feelings of powerlessness, and I felt compelled to go beyond forgiveness, even beyond gratefulness and to take back my power. And so I went back over the memories I carried and in my heart I gave what my abusers would take away.

As long as someone is taking something from you, they have the power. As long as you remain a victim, you relinquish your power. But when you give, you own your power. I believe this is why Jesus said if anyone takes away your coat, give him your cloak also. You release your attachment to what is taken from you when you go beyond being a victim and become a benefactor. And you own your power when you give as opposed to being taken.

Maybe this is the end of this particular journey. Maybe there are discoveries yet to be made. It doesn't matter. There will always be something to discover, in some arena or other. And so, the exploration continues.

To Suffer or Not to Suffer

We are all enrolled in this gargantuan University we call Life. Attendance is mandatory. But that doesn't mean we are forced to gain knowledge or understanding. That is entirely up to us. We can repeat the same courses for a lifetime. Or we can learn what we need to learn and move on. Sometimes, we are required to take refresher courses because we haven't practiced, and therefore have forgotten, what we previously learned in a given course.

There are lessons in this University, and then there are interpretations of those lessons. It's in the Interpretation Department that we often get into trouble.

For instance, I was enrolled from birth in a course entitled "Letting Go". My mother and father divorced when I was an infant, and I usually saw my father about once a year during my childhood and adolescence. Children often will misinterpret lessons, and I was no exception. The lesson I took from my father's absence was that I must not be worthy of his attention. Perhaps I wasn't good enough to be wanted.

And so for the better part of my life, I expected people to abandon me. And I learned to be self-protective. I even married someone who is emotionally unavailable, because then, hey, what have you got to lose?

The trouble with being self-protective is that you create your own loneliness. You feel disconnected, and even though that disconnection is illusory, it feels very real.

And the trouble with getting into "safe" relationships, where there is no sense of connection to lose in the first place, is that you miss out on the very wonderful experience of intimacy. I know intimacy, because I do have family members, including my children, with whom I have always shared a deep connection.

So, you may not have anything to lose when you play it safe, but you also have nothing to gain. What's the point of even going into such a relationship except to learn that this is not what you really want?

It is said that you can't change the past, but in one sense you actually can. You can change your interpretation of events in the past, and thus rewrite your own history. That is what I did when I decided I didn't want to be plagued with abandonment issues any longer.

I opened my mind and expanded my vantage point, and the idea came to me that there is no abandonment. People and things come and go from our lives in natural cycles of birth and death, gain and loss, meeting and parting. Everything is temporary. It is not loss, but our resistance to loss, that causes us pain. It is our thinking that it should not have happened. He should not have left me. He should have been there for me. Therein lies the source of our suffering.

I am not sure I have fully realized this lesson. But now that I know that my own thoughts, and not anyone else's actions, are the source of my pain, I know I have a choice. I can suffer if I choose to, but it is not necessary. What freedom!

The Butterfly is Emerging

Finally, I feel as if the metamorphosis I have been experiencing this year is nearly complete. I am beginning to reintegrate parts of myself that I had forgotten existed.

For our first meeting of the year, our Toastmasters Club, Frankly Speaking, held mini ice-breakers just to catch up with where everyone is and their visions for the coming year. Here is what I had to say:

About a year-and-a-half ago, I began my Toastmasters journey with a speech I titled Miracle Gro for My Soul. I mentioned several people and organizations that had been instrumental in my personal growth – my family of origin, my children, some of my friends and associates at La Quinta. Now I happily add Toastmasters to that list.

In the time I have enjoyed being a Toastmaster, I have experienced tremendous growth. Many of you have given me encouragement and support and love.

Also over the past year and a half, I have experienced my own “wilderness journey”, having only the vaguest idea where it would lead me but knowing that I was being guided every step of the way. Then over the past six months, I have gone through a sort of metamorphosis where I found it necessary to pull in my resources and focus the bulk of my energy on my transformation process. It was a time of endings, of letting go of a lot of things that were not working for me, and also a time of beginnings, of beginning to understand who I really am and what I am here to do.

To this end, a very dear friend pointed out to me that I am already doing what I am here to do. This led me to look at what it is that I do, what it is that I can’t “not do” – and I realized that everything I do stems from a desire to be God’s hands extended in loving touch. When I give massage or a hug, when I write, when I speak – my intention is always to touch profoundly, to connect deeply with those I touch, and to help them feel love.

Today, I am clearer than ever on what I am here to do. I am here to express God’s love in this world through touch, both physical touch and through words that touch hearts.

I am looking forward to living this vision each and every day. I am looking forward to the miracles that await me as I listen to my heart and follow my intuition. And I am looking forward to the looks on people’s faces when they ask me, “What do you do?” and I tell them, “I touch people.” Then, if they are asking out of genuine interest, I may go on to explain that I am a massage therapist, speaker and writer. If I sense they are asking from a desire to determine whether I hold any status in this world, I may just leave them with raised eyebrows and gaping mouths.

“Well, I never.”

Yep. There’s your trouble.

Getting Uncomfortable

This week in my Toastmasters Club, I took on the role of Toastmaster. I was reluctant to be Toastmaster because the theme was 9/11. I still don't talk about 9/11. I don't watch movies about it. I saw more than enough that day and the days that followed.

Nevertheless, I am the one who is always talking about stepping outside your comfort zone because that is where growth occurs, and so I knew I had to step up.

So, I gave it some thought, and I asked myself, “What is a terrorist?” A terrorist is a person or a group of people who use fearful consequences or the threat of fearful consequences to manipulate or control. Wow! When you put it that way, you have to admit that terrorism doesn’t always come from outside sources. Sometimes, the very people who have promised to serve us or to love us are the terrorists.

Consider the “peace” officer who batters or kills because he does not like the color of someone’s skin or his sexual orientation. Or how about the government agency that makes the lives of citizens a living hell by branding them communists. There are the religious leaders who teach that there isn’t room on the planet for us and those who disagree with us. And what about the angry parent or the angry child who keeps a family in constant fear and turmoil?

Where does terrorism stem from? Simply put, it comes from fear – the fear that someone else’s ideas or lifestyle is a threat to my survival or to life as I believe it ought to be.

After 9/11, I lost a lot of respect for the news media. They kept showing those images over and over and over again. Hell, we got it the first 15 times! It was like twisting the knife in the wound again and again and again. I also began losing a degree of respect for my government.

But you won’t find me soapboxing about what’s wrong with my country or what’s wrong with the world, for two reasons. One, I believe there is a lot more that is right with my country and a lot more that is right with the world than is wrong. Two, I have noticed that when I focus on what is wrong, I see a lot more of it. And when I focus on what is right, I see a lot more of that. What you focus on expands. And I know what I want to expand.

So, when I look back at 9/11, my question is not, “Who is to blame?” My question is, “Have we learned anything? Have we learned anything about fear and its children, hate and prejudice?”

This is Living

A couple mornings ago, as I awakened, I repeatedly heard the phrase, "You're presence is requested..." And it raised the question, How often am I fully present to whatever is occurring in my life?

I only know that I am learning to be more so. And that awareness is hot! Mindfulness is sexy! Being present now is bliss!

And yesterday morning, as I sat on the front porch, I noticed a spider's web. The breeze rippled it and created the optical illusion of rippling water. And the question arose, How can I discover something if I created it? And the answer came, You created it so you could discover it.

This morning, as I sat on the front porch with my parents, a butterfly came and landed on my dad's shirt, flitted away, then came back and landed on his hand. It left again and returned to perch on his knee, where it lingered quite a while.

It was fun to watch this particular creature. It had quite a sense of humor. It landed on the porch in front of the cat at one point, as if to say, "Catch me, if you can". Then later, as the cat was lying on the porch, the butterfly flitted across him well within reach of his paws, and the cat did take a few swings at it, but it was too fast. Imagine a butterfly taunting a cat!

There are so many wondrous things to discover in life, if we slow down and take the time to "stand and stare".

In the words of William Henry Davies:

Leisure


What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

No time to stand beneath the boughs
And stare as long as sheep or cows.

No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass.

No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night.

No time to turn at Beauty's glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance.

No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began.

A poor life this is if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

Come on, folks! Let's take some time to stand and stare.

Most of what seems so urgent right now will be fully forgotten and completely meaningless ten years from now.

This is living. This is life. You can't live yesterday, and you can't live later. Now is all you have. If you're not living life now, as fully as you possibly can, you're missing the only opportunity you're given.

Do it! Do it now! Just do it! Better yet, BE it.

No more!

My whole life I have been trimming myself to fit the world. No more! It's time the world learned to deal.

Stopping to Smell the Flowers

Hey, how would you feel if you were sitting right there in plain view, displaying your beauty and emanating delightful fragrances and nobody paid attention to you? I'm just saying, these gifts are presented to you. Why not enjoy them to the fullest extent possible?

By the way, I take stopping to smell the flowers very seriously. So, if you're ever out and about and notice some wild-looking woman stopped on the side of the road breathing in the essence of a patch of honeysuckle all the way down to her toes, it could be me. Stop and say hello, if you dare. :-)

Making Love with the Universe

Okay, I'm

supposed

to be writing. And I love writing. Don't get me wrong. But the breeze is ruffling the leaves outside and calling to me like a siren song.

And so I walk. I just can't stop myself. I get outside and I bask in the pleasurable sensations of the wind softly lifting my hair and caressing my skin. And I give voice to my pleasure.

And soft raindrops begin to touch my skin. And I see the profusion of green in the grass and leaves, and the splashes of color in the flowers. And I breathe in the fragrance of a gardenia blossom. And I touch the leaves, and the plants, and I feel my Oneness with All That Is. And I taste heaven.

Yeah, baby! That's what I'm talking about!

Don't Call This a Pipe Dream!

I recently read some poems written by some new associates of mine, and it woke up the poet in me. It's been years since I have written a poem, but this one came to me easily. I hope you enjoy it.

Gather my tears from East, from West,
From North, from South, wherever they've trekked.
And let them fall in a cleansing rain,
Till all the world is free from pain;

Till every heart is pure and light
And gone is the urge to hate or fight;
And everyone knows the joy of Being
And perfection is all at last we're seeing;

And all illusion just fades away
Truth dawns on us all like break of day;
And everyone knows that Love is all,
And every heart heeds Spirit's call;

And harmony is the rule of living
And everyone is loving and giving;
And the only law is the law of Love
And peace is on earth as it is above.

Don't call it a pipe dream! It can happen.

Life is Now

Recently, I realized that I was judging myself as a Possibilist because I did not save my marriage, but then it dawned on me this morning that even God won't mess with free will, so what makes me think that someone else's exercise of free will is my failure? So, I'm back on track and when I write and when I speak my story, it will be from the perspective of possibilities. We may have things occur in our lives we would not consciously choose, but we also possess the power and the possibility of transforming each and every one of them.

I love the song, "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield. It's kind of the way I feel about life right now. This morning, as I was taking my walk, it was raining - most of the time a slight mist, but it became a soft shower for about the last 1/8 of a mile. And I thought of this song, and feeling the rain on my skin, and I thought of my friend, Kari, dancing in the rain with her sister and her mother. And I thought, this is it. Life is now. It's not "happening" now, it is now. And what better way is there to live it than to experience everything that presents itself as deeply and as fully as possible?

We are presented with so many wonderful gifts daily - the trees, grass, flowers, the sun, the wind, the rain, the animals, and one another - not accidents of nature, but gifts lovingly created for our enjoyment - and just as we delight to see others enjoying the gifts we give, I believe it must bless the heart of God to see us enjoying the gifts we receive.

If you haven't heard the song "Unwritten", I hope you enjoy the lyrics below.

I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it

Release your inhibitions

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in

No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips

Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open

Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We've been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can't live that way

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it

Release your inhibitions

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in

No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips

Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open

Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten.


Have a blissful day!

Cathy

Love is Action

"Don't hide love. If you feel it, express it – not to demand that others love you back, but simply to live outwardly the best of what you feel inwardly. The worst that can happen to your heart is not rejection by another person, but failure to act on the love you feel."– Martha Beck, author of The Joy Diet.

Amen, Sister!

Love is an essential ingredient of a succulent life. And love unexpressed hardly counts for anything. Your love does little good to your loved ones as long as it just abides in your heart. Love isn't realized until it is expressed in words or actions. Then it becomes effective.

So, get it out there. Make it known. Take a chance.

What if you get hurt? What if you get rejected?

So what? You'll handle it.

If I Had It To Do Over...

If I had the opportunity to go back and change the "negative" things that have happened in my life...oh, I admit I would be sorely tempted...but in the end, I would leave everything exactly as it was - not because those events made me who I am today, but because they made me aware of who I am.

At our core, we are love. Through our varying purposes, personalities and preferences, we express different aspects of love in our world. My primary work seems to be edification, compassion, connection and touch. My belief is that the experiences of being misused and torn down made me aware of the need to build up and to support others. The experiences of being neglected and abandoned made me aware of the need to connect and express God's love at every opportunity. Oh, and isn't there plenty of opportunity?

We need one another. We need to remind one another of the powerful, loving, infinite beings that we are and to encourage and support one another as we awaken. We need to let the light that is in us shine so that others will feel empowered to shine also.

What are we here for if not to experience the fullness of the life we have been gifted with and to support others in doing the same? Let's do it!

Feeling Loved

I recently had someone from one of the e groups ask me about a comment I made about love. I had said, "Feeling loved is an enjoyable story, but a story nonetheless"

They asked, “So are you saying that it is not that important to feel loved...even though there is a sort of need for it in everyone of us?”

All of life is emotionally neutral until we tell ourselves a story. We can tell ourselves a story that creates heaven or hell for us.

My favorite story is about two fish swimming in the ocean. A shark swims by and says, “Isn’t the water grand!” Then he swims off.

One fish looks at the other and says, “What’s water?” The other fish doesn’t know either so they swim off looking for water. They spend their entire life searching, swimming from ocean to ocean. Finally, one day a turtle swims by and in despair they call out to him.

“Grandfather turtle, what is water?” The turtle swims slowly by, smiles and says, “My little friend you are swimming in it.”

As I see it, the universe is a vast energy system. The best way I can describe that energy is limitless, expansive, infinite, eternal, and unconditionally loving. In order to use the word love I had to shift my definition so it was free of judgment, rules and limits. To me love is the essence of that unlimited energy of pure creation. Everything is made up of that energy, there is no way to move beyond it because it is infinite and we can’t be separate from it because of its limitless nature.

So, we swim in a sea of love yet we spend so much of our life searching for love. If we tell ourselves the story that we are separate, we feel alone and disconnected from the universe. Yet we can never be alone because no matter what story we tell ourselves we are all one.

I often suggest people play the game of ‘there is no out there.’ There is often a great deal of resistance to that perspective, but when we adopt it we get to ‘see’ how our story stops us from experiencing the ocean of love always surrounding us.

We can limit our experience of love by demanding that it show up in a certain form. We can limit love by adding parameters or we can expand our experience by realizing everything is energy and as such an expression of love. I enjoy some forms of love more than others, but that too is based on my story.

I can stand out in nature and experience the wonder of creation. I can feel the wind and watch the trees and feel wonderful or not. I can walk out into the middle of an inner city and see decay and suffering or feel the energy of creation and be awed by its various manifestations.

No one does anything to us – we can choose to feel loved or unloved – there are no victims in life. There are only limitless, eternal, infinite beings having an experience and at times they choose to experience feeling like a victim.

The more we take responsibility for our experience the more likely we are to experience our true nature. We are limitless, expansive, infinite, eternal, and beings made of star stuff – made of unconditional love. And we are such magical magicians we can conjure up infinite number of experiences to pretend other wise.

It is all our creation – my suggestion is if you want to be happy embrace your creation and enjoy it. If you are feeling alone and miserable embrace your creation and be as miserable as you want.

There is after all, no out there.

With love, aloha and gratitude,
Susan

Check out my latest classes
http://SusanGregg.com/teachings.htm

Susan makes a great point. Several of them, actually.

Tears are Liquid Passion

Yesterday, and again today, the tears came. Oh, don't feel sorry for me. It's a good thing. It means I'm back, in all my heart-on-my-sleeve, true-to-myself glory.

They were cleansing tears, a needful step in clearing out the old to make way for the new.

I always say tears are liquid passion, and when I am deeply in touch with myself and my world, I cry easily.

I cry tears of compassion for those who are hurting and don't know how to heal. I cry for those who do harm to others, because only a deeply injured soul would seek to injure others. I cry tears of joy for the many wonderful people we share the planet with - those who reach out and practice random acts of kindness and compassion, some even going so far as to risk their lives for a stranger. I cry over sunsets, and oceans, and beauty of all sorts.

Whenever my heart fills to overflowing, the overflow expresses itself as tears.

And so I say, Tears are liquid passion.

And though our society shames the shedding of tears, I am not ashamed. My passion is my truth, and expressing it is my authenticity. If anyone is uncomfortable with tears, I invite them to look inside and discover the reason.

Perhaps it is because they are uncomfortable with passion in general. Maybe they have lost touch with their own passion, perhaps they have been shamed out of expressing it.

Being fully alive means being in touch with every aspect of yourself. That's definitely a journey and not a destination, and it's a worthwhile journey. Why should parts of you be suppressed, not allowed life and expression, locked in a prison cell and slowly starved to death?

Every bit of you is worthwhile, and deserving of love, acceptance and compassion. Yes, even your shadowy aspects, and we all have them.

And so I say, be you. Be all of you. Be okay with all of you.

The amazing thing is, when you are deeply in touch with who you really are, you will find that you have no desire to do harm to others, because who you really are is love.

And do not be ashamed of what you feel, of what you desire, and definitely not of who you are.

Give life and love and voice to all of you, especially your passion. Just do it!

It's Like This

If you discover something you are eating is poisoning you, and you have no intention of dying, the first logical thing to do is to stop eating the poison.

Then you've got to do whatever it takes to get the poison out of your system or take some antidote to neutralize it.

You can hardly expect to clear out the poison while you're still eating it, and yet that's what we try to do when we remain in an unhealthy situation while trying to heal.

Wow! When I put it that way, what was I waiting for?

Get Up and Go

I'm finally ready to extract myself from an unhealthy situation I've been living with for far too long. After years of waiting on God to rectify the situation, I've come to the conclusion that God has been waiting on me.

I've been looking for a miraculous solution. But the situation I'm in doesn't call for a miracle - just a little common sense, a fair degree of gumption, and some old-fashioned get up and go - literally.

There are a whole lot of aspects to this thing that I can't figure out, and I've allowed that to keep me in inertia and suffering needlessly. But the parts I can't figure out - that's God's business. I need to take care of the parts I can figure out.

A Leap of Faith

“If we listened to our intellect, we’d never have a love affair. We’d never have a
friendship. We’d never go into business, because we’d be cynical. Well, that’s nonsense. You’ve got to jump off cliffs and build your wings on the way down.” Ray Bradbury

Here's to leaping before we find our wings!

Resistance is Futile

I was thinking this morning about the collective unconscious, about all the things that we have agreed to believe together. Conditions are what they are because we have collectively agreed on them. So, the world conditions we accept are mostly the creation of beings who have gone before us.

Why should we settle for other people's creations? Why should we let other people's beliefs create our life experience?

I was thinking of how difficult it is to break out of the collective unconscious and create your own belief system, especially when you live among people who are still firmly gripped by the collective "realities".

It feels like trying to get out of the Borg. I can hear it now, "Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated".

The hell I will!

Metamorphosis is Hell

I mean, you're just ambling along happily, minding your own business, contentedly munching on whatever lies along your path, when all of a sudden, you get this overwhelming urge to wrap yourself in a tight, dark space and shut out the world while you work on your transformation.

Try explaining to your friends and family why you need to be alone so much.

I still wouldn't trade it for the status quo. Growth is change. That's why life offers so many lessons in letting go.

At least that's the way I see it. But, what do I know?

The "One" True Way

I recently told a friend that at this point in my life, I am all religions and I am no religion. I followed a path for many years that helped to keep me mired in depression, until I realized I had a choice.

Religion has to have a hook, and a good portion of them hook you with "love". Then, because religion requires membership, there is a need to keep people hanging in. This is accomplished by convincing you that you are fundamentally flawed and that the only salvation is in whatever brand of "truth" they happen to be selling. That's why there are so many different "one true way"s.

All through history, there are examples of religious zealots who believed they had the God-given right to take over the world and enforce religion as law. Bullshit! If God wanted us all to be alike and think alike, don't you think we would have all been created alike?

If religion can convince you that you can't figure out the truth for yourself, and that you must believe the "truth" as they sppoon feed it to you, or you will go to hell or experience some other horrible end, then they get what they need, which is faithful, controllable members. I don't believe that religionists do this consciously. I am sure the vast majority of them truly believe what they are teaching.

But here's my point. Our Creator didn't give us the gray matter in our heads just to fill up space. We are meant to think for ourselves. No one has any corner on the truth. We all have the ability to figure it out for ourselves.

And I have come to believe that my God, a God who would create such a vast variety of people and other creatures and features would not damn any of them, especially based on the fact that they don't all see or recognize God the same way. A lot of people would believe this to be heretical, but to be honest, I wouldn't be interested in associating with a God who would create people just to condemn them.

In the religion I once adhered to, I was taught how cautious we have to be lest we "fall into sin" and offend God. And do you know what I found to true? When I began setting myself free from the prison of caution and fear, I found I had no real desire to harm anyone. And if there is any definition of sin, it would definitely be doing harm.

Oh, sure, we all feel every now and then that we would like to see someone "get what is coming to them", especially when they have done harm to a child or someone less powerful than them. But I find that love always drowns out the other voices in my head, and at the deepest level of my being, love is what I am. I believe the same is true for you, and that's exactly what you will find if you dare to explore the depths of your being.

At the very most basic level, we are all made out of the same stuff, and that stuff is love. God is love and we are all manifestations of God in this world. How could a manifestation of love be anything less than love? How could anything God created be anything less than perfect? And how could anything God desires be "wrong"?

So, the way I see it, the "One True Way" is what you decide it is for you. And it is not something for any of us to force on one another. And if you believe I am "wrong" and that God is someone to be feared, well - I have been there, done that, got the T-shirt, and I would rather die than go there again.

How to Save a Life

I saved a life today! Admittedly, it was reptilian, so there won't be any award ceremonies on the steps of city hall...no press releases or kudos from the president. But I had fun, anyway.

I was going out for a walk when I noticed a mound of something in the road ahead. As I moved closer, I noted a tail protruding and a head disappearing with every passing vehicle. The poor thing didn't have enough sense to stay out of the road, but it was deeply aware of the danger that a couple of tons of metal barreling down the road at 45 mph presented.

Anyway, I waited for the traffic to clear - (Hey, I'll risk my life for another human life, but not for a turtle. Sorry. Maybe if I was a little more evolved :-) - and I approached the turtle. It soon became apparent that the turtle considered me as much of a risk as it did the cars. And since being chomped down on by the jaws of a snapping turtle was not on my list of things to enjoy today, I abandoned the idea of picking it up and moving it. I had to figure out how to get it out of the street without touching it. So, I began stepping toward it, careful to keep enough distance that it couldn't get a vice grip on any of my toes. And I managed to get it to turn around and abandon the street-crossing plan. By now, crossing the street was the last thing on its list of priorities, and escape topped that list. It is surprising how fast a turtle can move when it wants to.

And, being the goofy person that I am (hey, what's wrong with that?), I began thinking about the parallels of the turtle's experience to our lives. I wonder how often we bite and snap at the people who agitate us, not seeing that they are only doing what is in our best interests? By pushing our buttons, they reveal to us what those buttons are - areas where we could stand to grow and mature.

It is so much easier to treat the symptom of the agitation than it is to dismantle the source of the irritation. That's why we often find ourselves getting into the same situations over and over again.

Why not become our own heroes and sheroes? Why not go to the trouble to figure out why that person or incident is bothering us so much and heal that area or change our perspective so that we can integrate that lesson and stop going around in the same vicious cycles?

It's easier said than done, but it's worth our thought, time and effort. Let's do it!

Beginners!

There are so many things I am learning, and I feel like such a beginner in so many ways. Sometimes, it is almost embarassing how much I don't know. But the truth is, I hope I always maintain a beginner's mind. The greatest hindrance to learning is believing that we already know. That's not to say we don't know. But much of what we know is hidden and waiting to be discovered. That's why I am so turned on by exploration. There is joy and understanding and love and beauty hidden within like buried treasure waiting to be uncovered.

I remember always feeling like a beginner when it came to bringing up my children. Oh, I tried learning all I could from the "experts", hoping to avoid as many mistakes as possible. But often my children didn't respond to the expert techniques like they were supposed to. :-) So, then I would listen to my intuition and when I followed it, I invariably discovered that I held the key to my children's hearts, not some expert with fifty letters behind her name. I eventually relaxed into the understanding that parenting is a shot in the dark. And that as long as I love my kids immensely and intensely and make sure they know it, everything would work out okay. Even my mistakes would all prove forgivable.

And so, as the lifetime student I am, I will keep learning and exploring and opening my mind and heart to new possibilities. And I expect I will always be a kindergartner at heart - joyous in the expectation of discovery and exploration. Care to join me?

Metamorphosis

I came across this article this morning, and it's highly synchronistic as I recently became aware of a sense that I am going through some sort of metamorphosis myself. I don't fully know the meaning of it yet, but I feel a wonderful sense of excitement and anticipation. We are all in process of becoming aware of who we really are, when we are not hindering the process. Enjoy!

Light is Our Very Essence
By Liz Tayla
It is not exclusive to a select few, it is not dependent on position, status or education, it does not discriminate against age, race or creed, it does not depend on past history or present circumstances, all it takes is the choice which you have the right to make with your free will, to recall that Light is Our Very Essence. This enables love to shine through into you and from you, it is a feeling that has no equal.

It is during the process of Metamorphosis, of moving beyond current circumstances and beliefs that you can literally transform and actualize (act on and realize) the true self, your true essence. During this process awareness expands, new insights are gained and so many more moments are consciously chosen - to shift our focus upon the light and enjoy the feelings of joy and harmony it creates. Others feel the warmth radiate from us, our energy is different, enjoyable, lifting us out of chaos and hopelessness into the realms of possibilities and hope.

Moving beyond the limitations of our physical lives takes courage and faith. Courage to withstand the adverse reactions and misunderstandings that lead to conflict, and faith to realize that this process takes time. Your beliefs took you a lifetime to acquire so be easy on yourself when all manner of chaos breaks loose, you are in transition! It will pass; hold on to your faith and stay true to your vision. Even though only part of the picture is clear to you, it will fall into place as a new higher order unfolds.

It is also a process that will provide you with so many deeply fulfilling and rewarding moments, a natural high that is not dependent on anything or anyone outside of you, and as a result can not be taken away.

You begin to realize your ability to create and you begin to discover your unique skills and talents and that putting them to good use helps us all. You remember we are all connected, and our hearts share the same language. Our feelings start being honored instead of feared; they guide us towards integration of mind, body and spirit, into health and prosperity and out of oppression and desperation. We become constructive and less inclined to participate in actions that only lead to destruction.

In time you will have a rock solid foundation upon which to stand, and who you are and why you are here will be so clear that the falls will be minor in comparison to your vision and purpose. Your ability to discern what is and what is not in your best interests will become sharper through the heightened awareness of all of your senses and your increased sensitivity. These are wonderful qualities, they are not to be manipulated, criticized and used against us for someone's gain at our expense. In time you will see how these qualities work in harmony with others and for the benefit of all.

It may take some time for others to see and some may choose not to. The sadness and pain that may be experienced at such times, will in time be replaced with a sense of freedom from all that has tied us to old patterns of behavior, that at best kept us stuck and at worst harmed us.

Unconscious actions and words that do not have the welfare of another at heart, and are used for self gain at someone else's expense, cause so much damage and spread far and wide. This causes so much pain and division from one person to another - even generation to generation - and affects the quality of life for all involved. That is a very strong reason to stay true to your heart's call, as it will make a difference and quite possibly impact in a positive way on current and future generations. That is how important one person's determination is!

We are all making a difference whether we are aware of it or not. What kind of a difference is your choice. It will not always be a walk in the park, however it will lead you out of the dark.

Stay true to your vision and you will overcome the obstacles, the criticisms and all the attempts to bring you back down again - for who does that ultimately serve? Instead you may just cause the ripple in the pond that touches lives in a profound and wonderful way. You will be the source of inspiration and help to lift instead. We could all benefit from that, especially today's children, as their sense of truth is already very sharp.

It is reassuring to think of the difficult encounters in our lives, as shaping us and helping us to realize our strengths, as well as opportunities to work out who we are and who we are not, what we stand for and what we choose to believe and act on.

It is even more satisfying knowing that there comes a time when we finally realize enough is enough, and that the situations and people that brought us to our knees are no longer able to bring us down. They will either change their approach and treat us with the respect we deserve or withdraw, as that dynamic will simply not be entertained, now that your transformation guides you back into the highest expression of yourself.

You will find your confidence and sense of self worth increase and as a result you will attract more situations and people who value you and the contribution you make. A self actualized person is more likely to give, appreciate and honor in turn because they feel fulfilled. They are also more likely to look within, take responsibility and correct themselves, when they have contributed to a conflict.

Focus on all that you love and all that supports you. Take your focus away from what is not right and get back into the light, there is always support there for you. Seek out someone that believes in you, make it a daily choice to have healthy input. Rest, direct your kindness to yourself as well, and explore the things that make you happy. Have some fun along the way, it is all worth it and so are you.

Copyright © Liz Tayla 2007

Liz is an artist and writer based in Melbourne Australia and works with Flower Essences, Thought Field Therapy and Kinergetics. Interests include Metaphysics, Human Behavior, Raja Yoga and Tennis for the physical fitness, fun and sense of wellbeing the outdoor sport brings. Email Liz.

It’s OK To Want What You Want

By Claudette Rowley

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sail. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
- Mark Twain

Growing up, permission slips were a big part of school life – essential to participating in special projects, field trips or class trips out of state. For me to take part in any adventure outside of the classroom, my mother or father had to sign the slip. Now, as an adult, I can sign my own permission slip. In fact, I don't even need one! Yet I realize I often don't give myself permission to be who I want to be or do what I want to do.

How many times have you decided that you wanted something, and then denied yourself permission to have it or even ask for it?

Here are the top 10 reasons I’ve found people use to deny themselves permission to want what they want:

• I can't afford it.
• I don't deserve it.
• What will other people think? Someone might not like it.
• "In my family, we don't desire things like that. My parents had the same sofa for twenty years. Why should I be any different?"
• What if I get it and decide that I don't like it?
• I might fail.
• I might succeed.
• I can't have THAT (it's too big, too small, too expensive, too fill-in-the-blank)
• I'll have to step outside of my comfort zone.
• And the essence of all resistance: "I am afraid."

Here's the antidote to these limiting beliefs: IT’S OK TO WANT WHAT YOU WANT. It's that simple. You get to want what you want without judging it or measuring its merit or any justification at all.

Use these steps to get you started:

1. Recognize what you want.
2. Refrain from judgment.
3. Give yourself permission to want what you want.
4. Take the action required – for example: asking, buying, giving.
5. Notice what opportunities magically appear before you and what opens up inside of you.

Following these steps may feel uncomfortable; you might feel fear. That's okay. These are simply signs that you are move beyond your comfort zone. It’s a sign you are growing!

Each time you acknowledge what you want, don’t judge it. Act on it! It’s part of the flow of life. Life wants to give you what you want. Our socialization (see 10 limiting beliefs above) tends to complicate matters and have us believe otherwise. Recognizing what you want and giving it to yourself is a skill. And like most new skills, it requires building "muscle." The more you work this particular muscle, the easier it is to use it regularly.

Now It’s Your Turn

Take out a pen and, using the form on the following page, and make a list of 50 things that you want, both internally and externally. For example, an internal desire might be to achieve inner peace or self-acceptance, while an external desire might be to acquire a fun new sofa or a fun new job.

Write whatever comes to mind without any censoring. Got it? NO CENSORING! Include everything from wanting new socks to wanting to be more self-aware to wanting to be the President of the United States. Make it a stretch: If you can comfortably make a list of fifty desires, then make a list of sixty. If 100 is a piece of cake, I challenge you to create a list of 200.

As you make your list, notice the following:

• How do you FEEL? Do you feel excited about certain desires? Guilty about others?
• What physical sensations do you feel? Does it feel like someone is tightening a noose around your neck? Or do you feel like getting up to dance or pump the air with your fist?
• As you write down each item, what words pop into your head? For example, do you hear such gems as "Oh, that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard!" or "You can't have that! Who do you think you are? The Queen of Sheba?"

Pick your top 10 desires. Review your newly formed short list and again notice how you feel? What voices do you hear in your head? What beliefs pop into your mind?

Where do you notice your social conditioning showing up? How does your body feel? Do your top ten desires have a common theme? What did you just become aware of?

At the end of day, what we want is usually pretty simple and clear. It's our feelings and judgment that get in the way. Social conditioning that tells us that we must live a certain way, act a certain way and feel a certain way – and these inner voices stop us from acknowledging what we truly want.

50 Wants List

[Sorry, guys. You'll have to use your own paper or WP software here.]

Congratulations! You’ve successfully identified your top 10 desires. If you’d like to find out how to use this new information to improve your life, career or business, contact me for an introductory coaching session. Simply send a message to Claudette@metavoice.org or call me at 781.316.1923.


I felt this article was worth sharing. I know it's a recurring theme in my life. Perhaps you will benefit from it as well. As Clay Walker sang it in "Dreaming With My Eyes Wide Open", 'We can do some living, or spend our whole life hoping, but in the end we're left with what we chose.

What will you choose?

Variety is the Spice, Doncha Know

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." - Dr. Seuss

I've been thinking about us and the ways we tend to classify and sort ourselves and one another.

We seem to have this incessant need to compare ourselves with one another and make judgments based on those comparisons. I understand that competitiveness stems from our most basic need for survival. And yet, I feel that as we surrender to the love that is the truth of who we are, we will become more open to accepting the differences, variances and preferences that make us individuals.

Differences don't have to separate us. One thing that excites me is that in spite of the attempts of governments, religions and gargantuan bodies of water to separate us, people still find ways to unite. Love always finds a way to bring us together.

If you think about it, superiority and inferiority of personages is a farce, the same kind of unloving ideas that have separated races and classes and countries for millenia. What makes us think we are superior to the man on the street corner with the cardboard sign? What makes us think we are inferior to the billionaire with the three-story mansion? Maybe both persons are living the life of their dreams, and who are we to decide one man's dream is superior to another's? We may have our personal preferences, but everyone else is not obligated to share those preferences.

Do you know what I think the great equalizer is? The common toilet. Everybody has to sit down and take care of business, regardless of whether they are a leader of a great country or a lowly servant. True, some may use a bidet as opposed to common TP, but we all have our humanity in common - the same needs, the same drives, the same hungers and thirsts, the same eliminatory, and circulatory, and other systems.

What differs between us is a matter of preference, teaching, sometimes brainwashing, individual talents and intelligences, and the application of these. So what? There is more about us that is alike than is different.

We do have our own preferences, and we don't have to like everything about other people or their actions, but we can make room in our hearts for acceptance of others and acceptance of the fact that we don't have to be right and make everyone else wrong. And we don't have to accept other people's judgments, either.

We all have the God-given freedom to choose, and the blessed responsibility for creating a life that is meaningful to us, and joyful, and loving, according to our own preferences.

And thank God for the differences that make us all so interesting. It would be a boring world without differences. Variety is the spice of life, and God gave us an extremely spicy world. Our appreciation is in order.